I had another using dream last night. I dreamed I was with my ex piece of shit
boyfriend and he just robbed the neighbor for bundles of heroin. In my dream I knew I shouldn't use but I figured nobody will ever find out. The problem was the needle was so big and fat I couldn't hit a vein,lol. I tried everything. Finally woke up. I felt shitty as hell. I even felt guilty that I was going to use and hide it from my family. I know this is just a few of the things we face in recovery. We will come face to face with "using" friends. We will lose loved ones and jobs. We will face financial difficulty, problems in relationships and health issues. We will always have friends and family question are sobriety. But we need to stay strong. Just the fact that we quit using or drinking and started recovering is proof we can be strong. Do I ever want to use? Hardly ever. Do I ever want to drink? All the time! But I can't give in. I don't want to steal to feed my habit, or be with some guy because he can supply my drug of choice. I don't want to spend any more time in jail and away from my family. I may be broke all the time and live in a tiny apartment and work every day to still not pay all the bills, but, I have my life, my kids and my family. I love them all. So, don't let a using dream, old friend or day to day stress take away what you worked so hard to achieve. If you feel like using, pray immediatly and then find someone to talk to fast.!! Never give up!
Working from home for extra money
2 comments:
im 17 and have been clean for almost 2 months. i feel like crap and feel good at the same time. I have not seen 1 of my so called friends since i quit. i no thats good but it makes me sad too. I dont know y i wrote i guess i just wanted to get that out there. Maybe ill make new friends huh? Not
Good for you. Keep going. The friends you had that don't come around might be the kind of friends you want to stay clear of. I hope you have someone you can talk to. You can always come back here. Hopefully others will see this blog and join in. If you ever think you need to talk...torriocat@yahoo.com
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